Major and Champ
Major and Champ are two rescue dogs who are here to insure that the Inauguration runs smoothly. They are two very good boys who are prepared to be two very bad boys if you threaten the peaceful exchange of power.
Maxine
Think you won’t be vaccinated anytime soon? Don’t worry, Maxine the Vaccine Cat is here to make sure you get a shot, ASAP! She’s earnest, has nine best friends whom she hasn’t seen all year, and washes her hands constantly.
Postmaster Abe
Abe has been a postal worker for a hundred years. He wants to apologize for your mail arriving late this year—especially that gift you bought for yourself. He values your self-care, and, on behalf of the U.S.P.S., he’s sorry. Aw, what a sweet guy. We forgive you!
Suni Stimuli
These guys hail from the Check Republic, a D.C. bureaucratic department that is responsible for stimulus checks. They’ve been through a lot, and they just need a hug.
Phylicia
Couldn’t you just really go for a big bowl of pho right now? Good thing 2021 is the year of the ox, because Phylicia the Ox is ready to celebrate the Lunar New Year by letting you eat pho out of her hat.
Jake
Shh! Jake is still hibernating. Actually, he’s always hibernating, no matter the season, and you should, too! Stay inside, shut down your brain, and sleep through these turbulent times. You decide when spring is here, not your circadian rhythms.
Mrs. Screamy
I scream, you scream, we all scream for Mrs. Screamy, here to normalize yelling into the abyss to de-stress from pandemic life.
Karen the Squirrel
You balked when she told you she’d bought thirty-six packs of toilet paper in bulk, but she’s only a Karen in name, not in practice. She has a good heart, and goes around offering everyone toilet paper (three-ply, with aloe, too!), as well as a few of the nuts she stored away for winter. Karen likes getting day-drunk at Chili’s.
Jasper
Had a trash year? Jasper is here to dig deep and find the best in the dumpster fire that was life in 2020. He is a Sagittarius.
Otto the Mask Mascot
Otto the Mask is the only mascot who will wrap himself around your face. He enjoys nothing more than muffling the mouths of people who don’t want to wear him, forcing them to submit, and to admit that they were wrong. He is our true hero, and his presence puts the entire world at ease.
