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March 29, 2024
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Marjorie Taylor Greene Rips Biden Infrastructure Plan for Lacking Dome to Shield U.S. from Lasers

ATLANTA (The Borowitz Report)—President Biden’s infrastructure plan came under harsh attack from the Georgia congresswoman Marjorie Taylor Greene, who argued that the bill contains “no provision whatsoever” for building a giant dome to shield the nation from Jewish space lasers.

Greene, whose address to the House of Representatives was interrupted at several points by standing ovations from her Republican colleagues, said that the absence of a dome to offer protection against Hebraic laser attacks made the bill a “non-starter.”

“I cannot in good conscience support a bill that allocates billions for roads, bridges, and broadband but not a penny for giant-dome construction,” she said.

Putting a human face on the need for such a dome, Greene said, “I, for one, live in constant fear of lasers, except for Friday after sundown.”


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