Why do ten days’ worth of groceries last six days?
If I meditate for ten seconds once, is the psychological benefit high or very high?
After how many consecutive days of wear do gym shorts cease to be a discrete object and become a second skin?
Does the love I feel for the scallions growing in a glass by my window release the same neurochemicals as love for a human person does?
Is the neckbeard a recessive trait or is there an evolutionary benefit to what’s happening to my face?
Is it culturally acceptable (this is for the social scientists) to say “I’m eating for two” when the two is me and my patchy, pathetic neckbeard?
Where should I position the light source relative to my face on video calls so that I don’t look so “very, very sad, Zach”?
Yesterday, I made devilled eggs and it was not Thanksgiving. Is this a medical emergency?
Why does one side of the omelette take one minute to cook, but the other side takes one second to cook?
If a bottle of cold-brew concentrate makes eight glasses of cold brew, but I just pour it all in a glass, is that one glass of cold brew or eight glasses?
How many episodes of “RuPaul’s Drag Race” can be watched in a single day without causing Brain Damage Eleganza Extravaganza?
Is there a Nobel Prize for going back and reading the books you bought in college but never actually opened?
I’m considering letting my boyfriend cut my hair. How do you recommend I go about getting a boyfriend?
Why does thirty-day delivery from Amazon take three hours, but waiting in a grocery-store line for three minutes takes seventeen years?
My step tracker said that I took zero steps yesterday. How should I go about donating my body to science?
When is an omelette a scramble? Is a frittata just a fat omelette? How many eggs can one eat before one becomes an egg?
How many online history courses can one take before officially being declared a straight grandpa?
How much of a jog has to be jogged to not be categorized as a walk?
If you receive ten nudes on Tuesday, fifteen nudes on Wednesday, and ten nudes on Thursday, will I ever know love?
How can one manage to dirty every single dish one owns in a single calendar day?
How do I turn off Instagram Live notifications?
