On September 27th, the U.S. Fish and Wildlife Service proposed the removal of twenty-three species from the Federal Lists of Endangered and Threatened Wildlife and Plants, owing to their extinction, including the ivory-billed woodpecker and the Bachman’s warbler. Sometime within the next hundred and eighty days, the Department of the Interior will meet with the U.S.F.W.S. to consider the removal of the following species.
‐ Taupe-billed woodpecker
‐ Ecru-billed woodpecker
‐ Flat-white-billed woodpecker
‐ Eggshell-billed woodpecker
‐ Nacre-billed woodpecker
‐ Casa Blanca-billed woodpecker
‐ Ivory-billed veneer pecker
‐ Ivory-billed laminate pecker
‐ Marcus Bachman’s warbler
‐ Bachman-Turner Overwarbler
‐ Bachman’s enabler
‐ Bachman’s warbler’s publicist
‐ Corked bat
‐ Fringed surrey
‐ Ribless corduroy
‐ Tufted budget hawk
‐ Vernaculared chick
‐ Superglued yacker
‐ Non-hackneyed Liberty emu
‐ Uninsured trampoline center
‐ Six-toed defaulted-loan sloth
‐ Thin-blue-line straddler
‐ Hartford whale
‐ Charlotte bobcat
‐ Cheney-punch-lined quail
‐ Jumped shark
‐ Rebooted Cosby
‐ Dodo 2.0
‐ Toned mussel
‐ Kiwi mid-tan Giuliani
‐ Defiant Cuomo
‐ DNA-segmented Povich
‐ Murmuring Donahue
‐ Unseveranced white showrunner
‐ Sufferable boar
‐ Jimmy-proof lox
‐ Soylent Greengrocer
‐ VHS head cleaner
‐ Fingerless poi
‐ Howard Johnson’s fried clam
‐ Muted sycophant
‐ Neutered wacko
‐ Nuanced pundit
‐ Orthopedic perch
‐ Evenhanded flack
‐ Pets.com login retriever
‐ Emotional-support slug
‐ One-collared Bannon
‐ Agnostic mantis
‐ Irony-free hipster
‐ Tasmanian devil worshipper
‐ Unpleaded mob rat
‐ Strike-anywhere matjes herring
‐ Ringtoned lemur
‐ Wind-powered eel
‐ Renovated barn owl
‐ Make-your-own sunfish
‐ Filleted mole
‐ Zino-padded mule
‐ Elder Menudo
‐ Rabid Belieber
‐ Tribute-banded grackle
‐ Zantac-sponsored fête
‐ Surgeless Uber
‐ Xeroxed ass
‐ Cockalikewise
‐ David Koch-donated red-winged blackbird
‐ Labracheezdoodle
‐ Gen Z Gladys
‐ Spec Flying Nun
‐ Trending Gillooly
‐ Pro-bono weasel
‐ Luchow’s regular
‐ Wired Netflix residual
‐ Def honky
‐ Almond-milk snake
‐ Clean-coal canary
‐ Sparkling-water bug
‐ One-size water moccasin
‐ Yellow-bellied sap taster
‐ Half brother-in-law
‐ Bad penny
‐ Unbrushed mullet
‐ Fragrance-free moose
‐ MySpace denizen
‐ Undiagnosed narcissus
‐ Hep cat
‐ 3G Luddite
‐ Docked honorarium
‐ Solvent Kmart
‐ Common trash-can cheetah
‐ Coffee-room kitty
‐ Red-vested Walmart greeter
‐ Unembellished eulogy
‐ Dilemma-horned frog
‐ Iron-on seal
‐ Mediterranean fibre fly
‐ Two-button fly
‐ Woke Mennonite
‐ Disenfranchised wasp ♦